DATING: Dear Men, please stop
I'm not usually a ranter. Well, I am occasionally on my Podcast and YouTube, however the blog has remained a pretty rant-free zone; but sometimes the best way to get a message across is in a healthy rant! I want to discuss a couple things men have to stop doing on their dating profiles. I considered filling this post with screenshots of the f*ckery I seem to see on these dating apps, but to avoid my poor mother having to witness any of that, any kind of copyright infringement or future dragations I'll just give you a few examples of things I'm over seeing! As you probably guessed, this post was fuelled by my group chat with my girlfriends, so it's a collaborative effort.
1. Please STOP posting topless selfies
Honestly, we all love a good six-pack. But, I think most of us are past the shallow stage and know a six-pack cannot make you laugh - unfortunately. So guys, those washboard abs might secure you a match, but we know they can't bring killer banter! Also, it's super cringe! I love a good selfie, and I won't judge you for enjoying a selfie - but when you're stood in your messy bedroom topless posing in the mirror or in the gym changing rooms, it makes my stomach kinda clench, Just stop, I beg.
2. Do you feel cool having "looking for casual sex" in your bio?
Let's get one thing straight, a dating app is not a classified section of the newspaper. I don't understand why anyone would think it's okay to say that they're looking for casual sex. If you have that kind of arrangement with someone that's completely your prerogative, we are all grown here. But when you're advertising it on a dating app, I just think you need to move the hell along. boy, bye.
3. Shitty opening lines like "did fate bring you into my life?"
Okay this is a little hard, because opening lines are super hard. But do you have to open with a silly line, can you not just ask something relevant to our bio's? I'd rather you asked me what I studied at University, than drop some boring generic cringe line!
4. Why do you have a picture with your ex?
Sorry to skip back to pictures, but a picture does paint a thousand words! I don't care to know a single thing about your ex, and I can't see why you'd have a picture with her on your dating profile?! Does it seem more stupid when you read it?! In fact I'm going to put it out there, but I don't really want to see a picture of you with any girls; I don't care if she's your best friend or ex, it's so off putting. And, this was group chat certified. Come on guys, do better. I'm sure you could ask one of the lad's at fottie to get a picture of you looking masculine. One last picture related thing, please stop with the squad pictures. I get it, your friends are all buff and you're lacking in confidence...
5. It's not that deep, stop being so serious!
There's a fine line between not enough bio and too much. Some guys have a long bio's describing every in-and-out of their personality and career background; yes it resembles a LinkedIn profile! Also, please stop with the "don't match if you're not going to talk" - I'll do whatever the hell I want. And stop with those awful fake reviews e.g. "incredible lover" - my ex "wonderful lad" - mum. Just stop.
6. Don't be that hardcore-party-boy-with--sunglasses-on-in-the-rave-with-grey-skin...
If you want to party and get off your face - again, that's up to you. Even if I was that type of girl, I can't ever imagine looking at you gurning and think oh yeah, my mum is going to love you. It's so trashy and no one likes it.
Bottom line, I'll still use dating apps and love talking about them. However, guys please avoid replicating the points highlighted in this post, watch your online dating success soar..
What are you fed up of seeing on guy's dating profiles?
And guys, what do you hate about about our profiles?!